You're the Worst 5.10: "Magical Thinking"

Chris: So I guess I’ll go ahead and point out that the woman with Jimmy in the opening flash forward was the florist which is indicative of how this episode turns out because Jimmy never seems to notice anything going on with Gretchen until someone else points it out. I think the heart of what Edgar was trying to explain to Jimmy is that Jimmy still thinks of himself as a guy on his own that just so happens to also be marrying someone. It all goes back to Jimmy refusing to change, he so desperately wants to be the same selfish guy but that’s not going to do any favors in his relationship with Gretchen. Clearly something hasn’t been right with Gretchen in the last few episodes but Jimmy refuses to acknowledge it , hence why he hasn’t confronted her over the pill situation. The closer we get to the wedding (and Gretchen’s growing ambivalence towards it) the more the wedding seems to be doomed.

Alexa: The flash forward of Jimmy picking up the florist for what looks very much like a date is the latest discouraging look at his and Gretchen’s future, and the cracks in the foundation of their relationship continue to deepen in this episode. Gretchen is dangerously close to snapping, but Jimmy can’t bring himself to confront her about stealing Edgar’s pills. He’s well aware she’s struggling, but instead he’s fixated on continuing to live his own life. As Joel points out, independence in a relationship is not inherently a bad thing. It’s healthy for each partner to have their own lives and interests, but at the same time these two are building a life together. Jimmy has to think about Gretchen’s needs and feelings in addition to his own, and can’t just support her when it’s convenient for him. As for Gretchen, her storyline is following the same one step forward, several giant steps back pattern she and Jimmy have been stuck in all season. She actually is trying at work and cares more about her career than she ever has before, but unfortunately she is unable to make difficult decisions. That’s a crucial aspect of her job, not to mention being an adult in general. This party was a pivotal chance to prove herself, but because she doesn’t want to upset anyone, she sets off the sprinklers rather than dealing with the problem. To succeed at anything, including her marriage, Gretchen has to learn to deal with conflict. But she can’t really do that until she gets the help she so desperately needs - especially from Jimmy.

Joel: There’s no real healthy couple in this show. There might be one in a scene or two in some random episode, but pretty much every romantic relationship that we see on the show is an unhealthy one. From Gretchen and Jimmy, to Paul and Lindsay, to Becca and Vernon, to Jimmy and Gretchen’s short relationships with other people like Nina and Boone, pretty much every romantic relationship on the show has incredibly complicated, potentially relationship ending issues. (And we’ve gotten to see more than a few of those relationships end over the course of the show.) So it’s a little strange to see two of the characters spend so much time discussing what goes into a healthy relationship, when it feels like they’ve never seen one.

Obviously, there is some truth in what both Jimmy and Edgar are saying. Being in a relationship means being a part of each others lives. You aren’t just living together, you need to be invested in one another, you need to care about the things they care about, and be there to support your significant other, both emotionally as well as physically. Being in a relationship isn’t about building the lives of two people who live with one another, but about building a life together. At the same time, you don’t want to be the couple that does everything together, and spends every waking moment with one another. It’s healthy to have interests and passions that exist outside of your relationship. It’s not only ok, but it’s a good idea to do something specifically for yourself once in awhile. As important as it is to be a present and contributing member to your relationship, it’s also important that you’re still something or someone more than just half of a relationship.  It’s a pretty easy concept that, like most things in life, the key is a healthy relationship is balance.

But for some reason, this episode seems to be framing this conversation as Edgar being in the right and Jimmy being in the wrong. Maybe it’s because the dynamic that’s been established over five seasons is that Edgar is the voice of wisdom where Jimmy is forever wrong to the point of comedic ridiculousness. We’ve seen plenty of scenes where Edgar knows what’s best and Jimmy has to catch up, and this scene plays out exactly like those previous scenes. Jimmy says something, causing Edgar to shake his head and says the correct thing. Then the two go back and forth until Edgar finally says the exact right thing that causes Jimmy to see the error of his ways, and he goes rushing off to act on Edgar’s good advice before never thanking him for it.

Only this time, when we get to the choir in the park and Jimmy’s supposed moment of clarity, Jimmy isn’t exactly wrong. The choir is something that’s really cool, and Jimmy can’t wait to tell Gretchen about it. It’s something that they still get to talk about, and it gets to be a part of their day together, because Jimmy wants to share what he saw with Gretchen. Sure Gretchen may have enjoyed seeing the choir too, but Gretchen had to go to work. The alternative is for the couple to spend every moment together or else risk one person experiencing something that the other person doesn’t get to see.

Obviously the point of the episode was that Jimmy should be at Gretchen’s show to support her, and that’s not a bad idea, but the journey the episode takes to get to that point and the “moment of clarity” we get doesn’t make sense. In this episode, Jimmy expresses a fairly healthy idea of what he thinks his relationship with Gretchen should look like. It’s one where they still depend on one another and care about and confide in one another, but it’s one where they still exist as individuals as well. It’s clear that the episode want to point out how Jimmy needs to be present and take an active interest in Gretchen’s life, but Edgar, as the voice of reason over corrects to the point where the relationship he’s describing isn’t any better or healthier than the one Jimmy’s describing. Of course this was a moment that Jimmy needed to be there for Gretchen, but the path the episode takes to get to that point is so bizzare and roundabout that I feel like I’m ending up sympathizing with the wrong side.