The Clashy Ring Attire Wrestlemania Review #29

Joel: Unfortunately, there’s not much on this card to make up for the frustration of Twice in a Lifetime. I don’t know what it is about Brock Lesnar and Triple H, but these are two talented guys who just do not work well together. As bad as this match was, it pains me to remember this was one of the best matches that these guys put on together during this particular feud. I remember at the time also being surprised that Fandango’s debut landed with such a thud since they were obviously high on the guy, putting his debut match on WrestleMania, against Chris Jericho no less. Well now, seeing where Fandango’s career has gone, that thud is even louder rewatching the show. Honestly, CM Punk vs. The Undertaker is the only match I feel like praising here. It’s a strong match between the two of them, and has some nice spots, but I think both guys had a stronger showing the previous year. On a technical level it’s a great match, but the emotion for this match isn’t there the way it was for both guys in previous years, and that’s saying something considering the buildup to this match. But the real problem with this card it the main event. You know why Once in a Lifetime worked? Because clearly Cena and The Rock had exactly one match in them. The main event for this WrestleMania is a near identical match of their main event last year, yet somehow even worse. Everything novel about their last main event feels stale now. And the unexpected outcome of last year makes the outcome of this match all the more obvious and all the more painful to watch. The Rock doesn’t seem to have his heart in the match like he did the last time around, and surprisingly the same can be said of Cena who feels like he’s going through the motions as well. I’ve tried to keep my bitterness about Twice in a Lifetime from clouding my judgement about the actual match itself, but even looking at just that, it’s still not that great of a match.

Kue: Nope. Nope, nope, nope. Besides Taker/Punk, this card was garbage. Rock/Cena II was stale as shit. Lesnar/Trips was as slow and plodding as it sounded like it was going to be. Shield turned face in a throwaway match. Everything else was forgettable at best. This Mania was personally offensive to me due to them finally holding a Mania in the NY area (my hometown), and this muck was the best they could come up with? Yuck. Get to 30.

Chris: Yeah, I'm not a fan of Wrestlemania 29 almost from top to bottom. I wasn't feeling the staging, we don't need a recreation of the freaking skyline when they're in NY/NJ and everyone could see the skyline for themselves. It's the same complaint I have about their UK shows, we don't need a giant Union Jack and old phone booths on the stage to remind us that they're in a different country. What if WWE did that for every city they're in? It would be insulting and annoying. Also this has to be the worst theme song they've ever had, which is saying something considering they've had multiple themes from Limp Bizkit, Kid Rock and Flo Rida. But this one takes the crap cake because the chorus is annoyingly repetitive all while the only thing Diddy is doing is referencing other songs in the verses and saying that he loves that song. Diddy is a hack. The Shield's Wrestlemania debut was a decent one but you know Orton was in a rough patch when he had to practically beg the crow to react to him on multiple occasions during the match. Mark Henry won a match because he flattened Ryback, put that on the highlight reel. The tag championship was noteworthy just because of the crowd reaction for Ziggler and Bryan. It's weird to see Big E being so subdued compared to his current New Day antics. Fandango, you disappointed me so much. As great of a moment it was the following night, Ziggler really should've cashed in the night of Wrestlemania because that's the only thing on peoples' mind during the Swagger/Del Rio match. Undertaker and CM Punk was a good complete story in which the build-up was head and shoulders above anything else going on at the time while both entrances were incredible, the match itself was raised to the level of the story leading up to it. It's interesting to look back on a time when a Brock Lesnar match was met with a pair of eyes rolling into the back of their heads. The trio of matches against HHH was just an awful threesome of boredom and I'm very much okay with them never again facing off. Speaking of never again, twice in a lifetime can go die in a fire. However, in a way, we should be thankful for twice in a lifetime. Think about it, because of that match, Wrestlemania 29 ended with an entire stadium of people booing to their hearts' content and they rightfully should which is something I'm sure kept Vince up at night. Ever since, WWE has utilized the skills of Daniel Bryan and Seth Rollins to ensure their show doesn't end with that same response from the crowd. Does that mean I'm glad for twice in a lifetime? Absolutely not, WWE should know their audience more than that. Shame on them.

BD: Man this is getting hard to do. Okay so... this WrestleMania was like the last bunch, with the one good thing being Punk Undertaker. Unbelievably kickass match, easily Undertaker's only good one since the Shawn Michaels matches. Del Rio Swagger sucks because Swagger sucks, but this did kick off Ziggler's World Title run (the next night) which produced Del Rio Ziggler matches that were highly underrated. HHH beat Brock Lesnar because HHH still hadn't (or hasn't) figured out that he's not a draw anymore, ‎and Fandango kicked off his career by beating Chris Jericho in another horrible match so by all means WWE, keep telling me that beating Chris Jericho is a huge deal. Miz and Barrett wrestled an abortion, and Ryback Henry was so bad that it's almost a work of art. Rock Cena was worse this time than last time, and the crowd booed both guys at the end. I don't get it. They had a year to work on it, and a year to work on the one before... so they had TWO YEARS. To produce that horrible main event?  At least 30 is next. Thank gad.